Breaking Away, from the nest.

Ever since I could remember, I've been having difficulty dealing with the way my mom handles things.
Happy one minute and angry the next, I wanted to get away from it, but I always found some reason to either stay or crawl back after a lengthy spell of being away.
Based on certain jobs I've had, it was either easier to accomplish or quite difficult to partake depending on the pay and nature of the job.

Two years ago, I almost accomplished the goal of moving away in some form from my parents place, but that of course was cut short and now I find myself stuck back here making not-so-much money and dealing with the same bullshit I've been putting up with for most of my life.

As it stands right now, I've got the freedom to leave, but I'm more worried about providing for myself in such a way that I don't become a "houseless"(home is a state of mind) person.
Since the truck-driving thing's out of the picture and military service isn't an option for me(some bullshit medical DQ) this has turned into a pressing, brain-storming session.
At this point in time, the only viable alternatives right now would be to stay at my stepdads house until things get better, or take a job elsewhere and see about either finding an apartment I could afford or deal with roommates.
While my stepdads place is a good idea(the man's more laidback nowadays), the only thing stopping me is the fact that I'm still under a form of a "parents roof".
No true-independence as far as "my own place" goes and then there's the cycling distance(no car, just bicycle) and road quality(Oak Hills has predominantly dirt-roads) from his place to my work.
Aside from that, this would probably be a little easier to deal with than having to pay a questionable amount of rent+utilities in a place I have rather little knowledge about and a job that may or may not cover the cost of everything every month.
Roommates, on the other hand, are a totally different gamble to worry about.
You wouldn't know how many there truly are at the property you're trying to become a part of., what they do to get by may be questionable., overall personal habits that may get to you.

Essentially, there seems to be alot of uncertainty when it comes to getting out on your own.
No matter how much you try to mentally and physically prepare for bailing out of the nest, there's always this apprehension eating away at the back of year neck telling you that "there's bad vibe about this".

In the meantime, I'm going to see how much longer I'm tolerated before I'm forced to gather my things and leave for everyone's own good.
Hopefully, all will hold out until next November when I could hopefully start trucking again.
At least in that environment, rent and utilities were things I didn't have to deal with.
It's like travel-expenses, room and board all rolled into one standard-cab package.

College, the 8+ year long battle, Part I

Since graduating high school in '01, I've been taking various college courses at the urgings of my mom.
She has friends and other relatives that have kids who already got their so-called, "education" done and completed.
At the same time though, I've completed less units of various coursework as opposed to those I actually attempted.
At this point and "low-stage" of my life, I am once again being pushed into going down this road once more on the false incentive that I'll be satisfying myself.
If anything, only those who aren't myself will be feeling any sense of accomplishment out of such a task, while I'm only going to be stuck with poor health and a mountain of debt if I adhere to the fashion in which they want me to get it done.

One of the main reasons I've put the seeking of blue-collar work ahead of getting into the atypical approach of getting into a four-year university is due to the proverbial, "excess baggage" that is sure to come with it.
Yes, getting a degree might increase the earning potential, but also open the floodgates to future leadership and management responsibilities.
The way I see it, you either have "born leaders" who have been able to organize individuals from the time they began to walk, or persons with a certain amount of military training.
Since I never had either of those things happen to me, I would much rather stick to my established comfort zone to prevent the outcome of a future, professional mistake that could mar me worse than any trucking accident I've been in.

So, as I prepare to go back to the local college and see about getting my name removed from the "progress probation" list, I'm going to take a nice long look at programs that will have an even mixture of professionalism and anonymity.
If I'm to invest a little time and money into a path to get me away from home once more, I want to go in knowing that I will be able to accomplish this new set of tasks without having to worry about sleepless nights ahead.

Essentially, my main goal in life has been there all along.
Go to work, finish work, come home and forget about what I did at work.
Last thing I need to be hearing when I get home is, "Adam, we need to fix this scheduling arra.....click"